Tim Vine Quotes

Timothy Mark Vine (born 4 March 1967) is an English comedian, actor, writer, and presenter best known for his one-liners and his role on the sitcom Not Going Out (2006–2014). He has released a number of stand-up comedy specials and has written several joke books.
From 2004 to 2014, Vine held the Guinness World Record for the most jokes told in an hour; each joke had to get a laugh from the audience to count towards the total, and he set the new record with 499 jokes. In both 2010 and 2014, he won the award for best joke at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe and was the runner-up for the three years in between.