I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.
I don't like to do material people have heard. Now, they like to hear material that they know, because that's the stuff that made me famous, and, unfortunately, I don't do a ton of it.
You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
The bulk of my fans are my age, and I'm aging at the same rate they are. That makes me relevant. They like hearing what I have to say. I work hard at it, but it's addicting, really.
I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
People are saying that I'm an alcoholic, and that's not true, because I only drink when I work, and I'm a workaholic.
I do live like a rock star, but it's not as great as it sounds. It's a lot of traveling.
But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It's like anything else. It's a muscle you have to exercise. I write...