You murder someone at the Ice Capades and the place goes apeshit. You blow someone’s head off in a war zone, people step over the body and have a snack.
You can take the boy out of the Devil but not the Devil out of the boy
Words are weapons. They blast big bloody holes in the world. And words are bricks. Say something out loud and it starts turning solid. Say it out loud enough and it becomes a wall you can’t get throug...
When you jump off a cliff, is it better to land on jagged rocks or burning lava? I know this one. The answer is obvious: It doesn’t matter where you land. You just jumped off a cliff.
The Magistrate hasn’t said a word this whole time. He just stands there like a mantis, all insect patience and killer instincts.
The Magistrate has been watching this whole thing with the quiet amusement of Mike Brady watching his squabbling TV kids. Only this Mike’s kids are killers and Dad’s got a messiah complex.
So, why'd you come back? I'm going to kill some people, I tell him. I pour the Jack into the coffee. Probably a lot of people.The bartender picks up a rag and starts wiping glasses. Guess someone's g...
She kisses me on the cheek and runs back into Donut Universe. People in line glare at me, wondering why I rate special treatment. I saved your lives, assholes. Let me have a fucking donut. C
My head is full of monsters and I’m one of them.
Kasabian is still shrieking like a banshee, which is pretty good for a guy with no lungs.
If Mason wasn’t crazy before, he’s definitely joined the banana army now.
If Donald Trump and the Wicked Witch of the West had a kid, it would be Jayne-Anne. She looks like a librarian with some money and good taste in clothes but underneath the Verace, she's Godzilla with...
I wish I could say, No more Mr. Nice Guy, but the boat sailed on that one a long time ago.
I pick up a long, charcoal-gray silk overcoat at a West Hollywood rent-boy boutique. Anything heavier than silk will look ridiculous in L.A., and wearing a black overcoat is nature's way of telling yo...
I look at her bandaged hands. You all right? Just a couple of blisters. Some asshole convinced me to run through a furnace. He sounds shady. As your lawyer, I advise you to avoid him in the future. It...
I don’t seem to be alone anymore. Very well, says Vehuel. We’d like— Shh, he says, holding up a hand. I’m trying to count. Of course, Vehuel says in a tone that makes it pretty obvious she’s not used...
I don’t believe in conspiracies. Guys will say anything to get laid.
I actually feel kind of bad for the little curs. It’s not their fault they’re a cannibal florist shop.
How long has it been since I’ve seen sunlight? Down in the asshole of creation, it was a dim, perpetual crimson-and-magenta twilight.
Horned Toad’s pal, the baby face in the jeep, is running at me, firing the rifle. I guess he’s upset because he hasn’t grasped the fact that it’s really hard to hit anything when you’re running and yo...