“ I'm often dating people, but I don't say it because you sort of know it won't last long. Graham Norton
“ The people I want are very famous and very rich, and all I can offer them is a bit of exposure on TV and a bit of cash, so it's a miracle we get any guests at all. But we have been very lucky. Graham Norton
“ Because society places a value on masculinity, gay men aspire to it. If you go to a gay club and the doorman says, 'You do realise this is a gay club, don't you lads?' you get all excited because you… Graham Norton
“ My ambition was to stop waiting tables. That was how I measured success: finally, I was able to stop waiting tables, and I was able to pay the rent, and that was by being a stand-up comic. Not a very… Graham Norton
“ My parents grew up working class, but in that way that working class families do, they spent a fortune on education to better me. Graham Norton
“ All my day is spent dealing with other people. When I come home I like it to be empty. The presence of others in my house kind of annoys me. I love coming home and shutting the doors. I feel brain dea… Graham Norton
“ Straight men just can't imagine the bliss of being in a relationship with someone who finds farting as funny as they do. Graham Norton
“ It's amazing how I can just ramble on for hours, isn't it? And so unentertaining or uninteresting. But I can ramble on for hours. It's a sort of terrible gift, isn't it? Graham Norton
