Every attack should bring death. Every death should be legendary.
He knew exactly what he was doing with every atrocity he committed. There is no hope for someone who loses themselves to righteousness.
Hopefully this girl gets a happy ending. The last two sure as hell didn’t. I
What humanity fears, it exterminates,
There’re going to be a lot of unexplained scars in the morning.
Let’s just go inside. Amen, Dominic said as he dropped out of the shadows behind Dell, who proceeded to jump and squeal. It was a manly squeal.
Ale burns like a bitch when you shoot it through your nose.
Drag fertile human women into fairy mounds to provide milk for the fairy children.
Some of us were not born to fight. When the options are fight or die, everyone was born to fight.
Unless you consider pissing yourself and running away screaming a gift, which some do.
I worked hard not to stare when she leaned forward, showing me more cleavage as she laughed. I’d consider my effort not to stare a moderate success.
How can you make jokes after learning such things? You learn to laugh, or you paint the walls with your brains. But what I said was, It’s how we cope.
It was a little odd being single and watching an old girlfriend get married. It was also pretty funny knowing at least three people in the room, besides the groom, had slept with the bride.
I watched the road as the sun fell lower in the sky, and the vampire god beside me nobly scarfed down a slider.
I stared at my sister as she started walking back to us. Blood ran down her chin and was splattered across her face. He’s dead, she said. Thank you, Captain Obvious, I said.
He glanced down at the paper, then looked at Sam. His jaw opened slowly and he turned back to the picture of Elizabeth’s mom. Fuck me, is that a pigeon head in her hair? Please tell me you did that. Y...
Have you ever eaten meat on a Friday? Mike asked as the stairs echoed beneath our footsteps. What? I said. Does cow count? Ah, then you were already going to hell, Mike said.
Good for naps, Alan said, stretching his legs out with a lazy smile. I gave Alan a slow nod. You’ve learned my most secret of secrets. You can never leave here alive. Just ignore him, Alan said. He ha...
I’m impressed you survived your childhood, Damian, Alan said. We all have our talents, I said.
Almost on cue, both vampires snapped out their fangs and slammed them into the top of the cups. Vampire sippy cups, I muttered. Both of them stifled laughter in an effort not to spray the room in bloo...