“ As the station wagon pulled back onto the highway, the sun was slowly sinking below the horizon like a leaky boat. Well, except for that fact that boats are not generally round, orange and on fire. Hm… Cuthbert Soup
“ You see, unlike most writers today, I do not use a computer. I write the old-fashioned way: on the walls of caves. Cuthbert Soup
“ I'll get it," said Jough in his man-of-the-house voice, a full octave lower than his regular voice. Cuthbert Soup
“ I should mention, by the way, that LVR stands for Luminal Velocity Regulator. I suppose it could also stand for Large Venezeulan Rats, but in this case it does not. Cuthbert Soup
“ Captain Jibby looked at the door, clenched his teeth, and worked his face into a scowl so fierce you would think the door had insulted his mother - which, for the record, it had not. Cuthbert Soup
“ Well, well, well," said Aitch Dee, his arms folded across his chest. "Well, well, well, well," replied Pavel, not to be out welled. Cuthbert Soup
“ Advice to explorers everywhere: if you would like to recieve due credit for your discoveries, keep a detailed account of your journeys as Columbus did. On Septemeber 28, 1492, after four weeks at sea,… Cuthbert Soup
“ You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him participate in synchronized diving. Cuthbert Soup
“ There is no shortage of well-known pirates, including: Henry Morgan, Captain Kidd, Blackbeard, Blue beard, Yellowbeard, and Yellow beard with Black Roots, who surmised that, if blondes have more fun,… Cuthbert Soup
“ On the forest floor was the LVR's smoldering ceiling panel, just lying there like the lid of a sardine can that had been eagerly and violently thrown away by someone who very much liked sardines. Cuthbert Soup
“ Yes you are right," said Pavel. "We will succeed simply because we are the best in all of world. We will get LVR by using incredible intelligence." Leon showed he was in full agreement by screaming an… Cuthbert Soup
“ I'm one-half Cherokee, one-half Irish, one-half Turkish, one-half Australian and one-half Korean." "Excuse me, but that's five halves," said Maggie. Cuthbert Soup
“ Gone are the days when the old country doctor would drive out to your house and amputate your infected leg for a basket of goose eggs and a rhubarb pie. Cuthbert Soup
“ I seem to be allergic to whatever that terrible smell is," said Gateman when the urge to sneeze had finally subsided."What terrible smell?""The air," said Gateman. "It smells...different.""That's call… Cuthbert Soup
“ The great William Shakespeare said, "What's in a name?" He also said, "Call me Billy one more time and I will stab you with this ink quill. Cuthbert Soup
“ Well," Mr. Cheeseman interjected. "Perhaps there's an easy solution to this. Maybe Captain Fabulous has an alter ego.""What's an alter ego?" asked Gerard."It's a superhero's true but secret identity,"… Cuthbert Soup
“ What's a wingding? Why, a wingding is, uh...it's just like a shindig but without all the hullabaloo. Cuthbert Soup
“ Musicians have always had a better understanding of love than the rest of us. Over the years they have told us that love: is like a rock, is here to stay, is all you need, will find a way, will keep u… Cuthbert Soup