So nerds rule.
So know this, little one. Whether you are the Messiah, or you become a rabbi, or even if you are nothing more than a farmer, here is the sum of all I can teach you, and all that I know: treat others a...
Snake eyes! the croupier said. Lizard dick! Coyote shouted back.This sent me to convulsions.
She's studying the Existentialists this month. Asked for a study day last week to kill an Arab on the beach.
She's so obnoxious. Like a whole Saturday night drunk tank full of obnoxious packed into one little body. Detective Cavuto
She's evil. Evil, evil, evil. I want to see her naked.
Protect and served, lunch—SFPD motto.
People thought I was one of those people who beats their kid in department stores. Don’t be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It’s the ones who jus...
Othello, you must, with fearful vigor and utmost alacrity, marry this bitch.
Nothing says Christmas like a burning meth lab.
My ma had a record of that Moron Tallywacker Choir singin’ Christmas music. Sounded like someone hurtin’ a dog. I broke it and melted it on the radiator.
Maybe life is just easier if you're a little goofy...
Like most Beta Males, he didn't realize that being a good guy was not necessarily an attraction to women.
It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.
It's easier to keep a secret if people think you're crazy
It was the kind of kiss that he wanted to wake up to and keep refreshing periodically until he got one long last one, salty with tears, in his casket.
In my time we had very few words, perhaps a hundred that we used all the time, and thirty of them were synonyms for guilt.
I could stand on my head and flick the bean right there at the dinner table and my mom would be all, Honey, Christmas is family time, we should be together and make me finish in front of everyone.
How would I feel, he thought, If I woke up and she was making love to me? Why I believe that I would be pleasantly surprised.
How could you deal with a creature as devious as woman.