Charles L. Whitfield Quote

The emotional pain hurts so much that we defend against them by the various unhealthy ego defenses described in Chapter 8, thus shutting the feelings out, away from our awareness. Doing so allows us to survive, although at a price. We become progressively numb. Out of touch. False. When we are thus not our Real Self, we do not grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Not only do we feel stifled and un-alive, but we also often feel frustrated and confused. We are in a victim stance. We are unaware of our total self, and we feel as though others, the system, and the world are doing it to us, as if we are their victim, at their mercy. A way out of this victim stance and its pain is to begin to identify and to experience our feelings. An effective way to facilitate knowing and experiencing our feelings is to talk about them with safe and supportive people.

Charles L. Whitfield

The emotional pain hurts so much that we defend against them by the various unhealthy ego defenses described in Chapter 8, thus shutting the feelings out, away from our awareness. Doing so allows us to survive, although at a price. We become progressively numb. Out of touch. False. When we are thus not our Real Self, we do not grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Not only do we feel stifled and un-alive, but we also often feel frustrated and confused. We are in a victim stance. We are unaware of our total self, and we feel as though others, the system, and the world are doing it to us, as if we are their victim, at their mercy. A way out of this victim stance and its pain is to begin to identify and to experience our feelings. An effective way to facilitate knowing and experiencing our feelings is to talk about them with safe and supportive people.

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About Charles L. Whitfield

Charles L. Whitfield was an American medical doctor in private practice specializing in assisting survivors of childhood trauma with their recovery, and with addictions including alcoholism and related disorders. He was certified by the American Society of Addiction Medicine, a founding member of the National Association for the Children of Alcoholics, and a member of the American Professional Society on the Abuse of Children.
Whitfield taught at Rutgers University and was a best-selling author known for his books on the topics of general childhood trauma, childhood sexual abuse, and addiction recovery, including Healing the Child Within and Memory and Abuse: Remembering and Healing the Effects of Trauma.
Whitfield was recognized for his sixty published articles and fifteen published books. Some of his works were: Healing the Child Within (1987), Memory and Abuse (1995), and The Truth About Mental Illness (2004).