I don’t like going into this with a half-baked plan. It’s not half-baked, I said. It’s mostly baked. Just a little soft in the middle. Actually, that was bravado.
I always told my callers, you can choose. You can decide what to do. Don’t blame your homicidal urges or basic assholeness on being a monster, because you can choose. God help me. God, help me.
Even when you felt that your own life had tumbled irrevocably out of control. You did what you had to do, somehow. You kept racing ahead and hoped for the best.
You only get married the first time once. There was the philosophy of a generation wrapped up in a tidy little sentence
You mean like some kind of A Midsummer Night’s Dream shtick? For real?
It’s my husband. I think— I think he’s a zombie. I smiled. Believe it or not, I get this one a lot. Can you describe his behavior? Why do you think he’s a zombie? She huffed. He doesn’t do anything! H...
He was not up to the lecture he’d get from Ben, and he couldn’t call Ben without telling him he was headed to a midnight showdown with Anderson Layne. Not that Kitty wouldn’t lecture him, but the lect...
Have you thought about going insane? It would seem like a reasonable thing to do, given his circumstances.Did once. Got boring, so I snapped out of it.
Finding unscented candles was another challenge he never thought he’d have to face. Colors were fine, colors could be useful as elements in various spells. But since meeting Amelia, he’d spent way too...
Cormick! Anything even remotely resembling trespassing and breaking and entering is going to look bad to a parole officer!'Cormick stopped, then turned and headed back to the car, 'I hate that.'I thou...
Are you sure this is necessary? I was hoping we could just leave Philos be. Enid turned on her, glaring. After all Philos had done, after he’d potentially undermined the entire community, she could st...
You know, it isn't that were particularly good at granting wishes, or finding things or, well, . Playing tricks, maybe. but we pay attention. We find the loose thread that everyone else misses and tug...
You know, I'm sick and tired of people pointing rifles at me.
The underworld, the old world, is the womb that gave birth to humanity. The journey from under the earth is the journey from ignorance to wisdom.
Next caller. Betty, you're on the air. What's your question ?Hi, Kitty. I just wanted to know, are you going out with that Cormac guy from last month?My jaw dropped. What?Are you going out with that C...
Just so you know, I'm straight. Totally straight. As an arrow.Her voice held a smile. So am I
If vampires ever spend less time playing theatrics and living down to their stereotypes, they might actually take over the world someday
I started a new page and wrote a title at the top: TenWays to Defeat Macho Dickheadism. Then I realized that most of the world's problems stemmed from macho dickheadism, and if I could defeat that I c...
I punched to line. Yes? What?Norville. It's Cormac. If you don't change the subject right now, I'm going to have to go over there and have a word with you.
As if death were a resource that had to be earned, that could ever be used up or wasted.