I have been trying all my life to like Scotchmen and am obliged to desist from the experiment in despair.
The British love permanence more than they love beauty.
The English woman is so refined She has no bosom and no behind.
There will always be an England While there's a country lane Wherever there's a cottage small Beside a field of grain.
No one can be as calculatedly rude as the British which amazes Americans who do not understand studied insult and can only offer abuse as a substitute.
One matter Englishmen don't think in the least funny is their happy consciousness of possessing a deep sense of humour.
Britain's best bulwarks are her wooden walls.
The English instinctively admire any man who has no talent and is modest about it.
England is a nation of voyeurs.
I find the Englishman to be him of all men who stands firmest in his shoes.
The nice sense of measure is certainly not one of Nature's gifts to her English children ... we have all of us yielded to infatuation at some moment of our lives.
What should they know of England who only England know?
I regard England as my wife and America as my mistress.
Nothing unites the English like war. Nothing divides them like Picasso.
[...]you know what they say about messengers, right?Excuse me?Too much bad news will get you shot.[...]
His Majesty's dominions on which the sun never sets.
God save our Gracious King Long live our Noble King God save the King. Send Him victorious Happy and Glorious Long to rule over us God save the King.
Whatever the rest of the world thinks of the English gentleman the English lady regards him apprehensively as something between God and a goat and equally formidable on both scores.
In the end it may well be that Britain will be more honoured by the historians for the way she disposed of an empire than for the way in which she acquired it.
The difference between the vanity of a Frenchman and an Englishman seems to be this: The one thinks everything right that is French the other thinks everything wrong that is not English.
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