Annabelle was practically standing on my back. It was like wearing an Annabelle backpack.
Ophelia was beating some poor underling for not knowing her arse from the sparse collection of cells between her ears.
...I supplied in a tone so saccharine that it should have tipped him off that his testicular health was in serious peril.
This look said I was uncomfortably near some line. Nikos had a lot of lines, all hidden. If you shot a marble in on one side of his personality, instead of coming out the other it would bounce on secr...
She wasn't the type. Her idea of exercise was lifting a fork.
Leave before I have to rip your eyes out with my dull Lady Bic razor.
If one is going to spend her afternoon singing hymns to the great porcelain goddess, she might as well do it in a really plush ladies room. Stupid fear of public speaking.
He was always 'checking in' to see if I needed any help with my campaign, which on the surface seemed nice enough, but it was done in a condescending tone that made me want to staple his lip to his ti...
I held it together for the rest of the drive home but as soon as Kelsey dropped me off I flopped face down on the couch and sobbed like a reality TV star on confessional day.
Hubert's wife, Mindy, was a tiny powerhouse of a woman with a halo of wild blond hair and eye makeup so complex it took me a while to locate her pupils. She was clearly the brains of the operation, su...
Wait until you meet my family. At Thanksgiving, we kill everything we can find, put it into a pot, and call it 'holiday gumbo'.
I could run, too, but my feet hurt. It's tough being a fashion vixen.
I've also been known to cry during MasterCard commercials.
While I had no intention of hooking up with him, I still wanted him to want to hook up with me.It was the principle of the thing, after all.
Do you mind if we leave here so I can chain smoke 'til I throw up so it will be easier to quit?
I'm twenty-nine, happily single and getting it on a regular basis' I said, enjoying the way their thin lips hung open in an impressive O.'Well I've never,' Jane gasped.'Clearly. You should try it some...
Just in front of her lay the Congaree Swamp National Forest. To prove it, a mosquito the size of a kitten landed on her arm and prepared to drill.
You wish for what's called wooing. This customary game, where the man shows the woman that resistance is impractical, strikes me as quite pointless.
Some people say Earth is the bottom level of Purgatory.' She pointed toward the floor and frowned.'I call it the top floor of Hell.
