When she comes to retrieve me [in the nursing home], after the tan-colored pudding with edible oil topping has sat for a while and been removed...
When did I stop being me?
Violet was nothing if not sensible. She didn’t even approve when we pulled entirely harmless pranks, like hiding someone’s yacht in the wrong slip, or turning the racquet club’s pool water purple.
To be sure, I'm not perfect wife material: I'm neurotic. I'm compulsive. I speak before I think and can't cook worth a damn. I'm messy and germaphobic all at once, and it's not entirely unheard of for...
There is no question that I am the only thing standing between these animals and the business practices of August and Uncle Al, and what my father would do--what my father would want me to do--is look...
The longer I do this job, the less I like people. The species, of course, he adds grimly. There are individuals I like just fine.
Now, go shovel some shit.
I'm glad has promised three dollars and a bottle of Canadian whiskey to the man who puts on the best show. You've never seen such grief-even the dogs are howling.
I strain to hear, but my old ears, for all their obscene hugeness, pick up nothing but snippets:
I stare at her for a long moment. I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her more than I've ever wanted anything in my life.
I hate this bizarre policy of protective exclusion, because it effectively writes me off the page.
I hate this bizarre policy of protective exclusion, because it effectively writes me off the page. If I don’t know what’s going on in their lives, how am I supposed to insert myself in the conversatio...
I had my whole life planned.. I knew exactly where it was taking me..
His mother was exacting revenge because he’d dared to marry me, and his father—well, we weren’t exactly sure. Either
He stares at me, and then leans back in his chair. He's ill, Jacob.I say nothing. He's a paragon schnitzophonic.He's what?!Paragon schnitzophonic, repeats Uncle Al. You mean paranoid schizophrenic?Sur...
Ellis had slept through the entire thing. That, or he was dead, but I saw no reason to check. If he was dead, he’d still be dead in the morning.
And you know what they say. Always carry a large flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and further, always carry a small snake.
Always carry a large flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and further, always carry a small snake.
Afterward, I curl around her. We lie in silence until darkness falls, and then, haltingly, she begins to talk...She speaks without need or even room for response, so I simply hold her and stroke her h...
Poking a lump of red Jello that jiggles outrageously, like a breast I once knew.