P.G. Wodehouse Quotes

The snail was on the wing and the lark on the thorn - or, rather, the other way around - and God was in His heaven and all right with the world. And presently the eyes closed, the muscles relaxed, the...

The storm is over, there is sunlight in my heart. I have a glass of wine and sit thinking of what has passed.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

There is a fog, sir. If you will recollect, we are now in Autumn – season of mists and mellow fruitfulness.

There is enough sadness in life without having fellows like Gussie Fink-Nottle going about in sea boots.

There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter.

There you see two typical members of the class which has down-trodden the poor for centuries. Idlers! Non-producers! Look at the tall thin one with the face like a motor-mascot. Has he ever done an ho...

There's no doubt about it, being a policeman warps a man's mind and ruins that sunny faith in his fellow human beings which is the foundation of a lovable character. There seems to be no way of avoidi...

These are the times that try men's souls. It's never pleasant to be caught in the machinery when a favourite comes unstitched, and in the case of this particular dashed animal, one had come to look on...

They walked on in silence. Katie's heart was beating with a rapidity that forbade speech. Nothing like this very direct young man had ever happened to her before. She had grown so accustomed to regard...

This man's brother I was telling you about, said Spennie, says there's only one rhyme in the English language to 'burglar', and that's 'gurgler'. Unless you count 'pergola', he says——

Unlike the male codfish, which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look w...

Very rapidly now Freddie realised that what he had been wishing for was a partner to share the perils of this enterprise which he had so rashly undertaken. In fact, not so much to share them as to tak...

Wait a minute while I think, said Miss Peavey. There was a pause. Miss Peavey sat with knit brows.How would it be... ventured Mr. Cootes.Cheese it! said Miss Peavey.Mr. Cootes cheesed it.

Wait till you see her. Sort of woman who makes you feel that your hands are the color of a frightful tomato and the size of a billiard table, if you know what I mean.

We Woosters do not lightly forget. At least, we do - some things - appointments, and people's birthdays, and letters to post, and all that - but not an absolutely bally insult like the above.

We're all alike when we get bustled. We don't know what we're doing, and by the time we've put our hands up and got into shape, why, it's all over, and there you are. Don't you worry yourself, sir.

Well, the natives seemed fairly friendly, so I decided to stay the night. I made a mental note never to seem fairly friendly to an explorer. If you do, he always decides to stay the night.

What if he does think you the world’s premier louse? Don’t we all?

What you want, I said, is to look out for a chance and save her from drowning.I can't swim.That was Freddie Bullivant all over. A dear old chap in a thousand ways, but no help to a fellow, if you know...