Without a certain number of these attributes, a newcomer is unlikely to make it in America. The attributes of resilience are Future orientation Energy and good health The ability to pay attention Ambi...
We wither, sag, wrinkle, crinkle, tatter, and become marked by life’s events. Time and gravity, air and water wear us down, each into a unique and precious beauty, every bit as beautiful as a landscap...
W. S. Merwin . . . traced our attitude of dominion to the beginnings of agriculture. He argued that settling down in permanent places gave us the illusion of possession. That fateful moment in our hom...
Visiting with other human beings may be one of the most ancient healing tonics.
Via our machines— be it phone, television, or computer— we receive an enormous amount of information every day. But we don’t have the time, the energy, and the emotional resilience to deal with all of...
Those who do not suffer become insufferable. Our depth comes from experiencing a wide range of emotions, including profound tragedy and our strength comes from that which could destroy us. As we grow...
This life stage requires a constant process of adjustment and accommodation
The kinder you are to them the longer they last. Another woman asked, What are you referring to? Then, one by one, the rest of us chimed in, Your knees, Your bank account, Your swimsuit, and Your husb...
Teresa was dying, she said, I have worked for God all of my life and I know I will soon be dancing in heaven. But I wish I had danced more during my time on earth. No matter what situation she was
Self-awareness allows us to separate our own needs and desires from those of others. We can ask over and over again, What part of this interaction is about me? What part of this situation is not about...
Over the years my friends and I have discovered many empty, wild places. Invariably, when we get lost or something goes wrong, one of us reminds the others, Remember the first rule of the wilderness:...
One of our most effective coping skills is simply sticking together. In a 2011 New Yorker article called Social Animal, David Brooks writes, Research over the past thirty years makes it clear that wha...
Older people could see themselves as part of a circle of caring that begins with our oldest living relatives and flows down to the youngest baby.
Of course, the world is not divided into two types of women: those who grow and those who don't. All of us fit into both groups almost every day of our lives. Some of the time, we are good copers and...
Newcomers do not pay taxes. In fact, refugees pay taxes, including property taxes.
Monique teaches her daughters the names of the trees, birds, wildflowers, and ornamental plants. She wants them to pay attention to the natural world, which will always be a solace to them, no matter...
Monique once told me, It is the driven of the world who have the hardest lives. They don’t see their families or have time to enjoy a garden or a bedtime story. They may have money and prestige, but t...
Laughter, music, prayer, touch, truth telling, and forgiveness are universal methods of healing.
In our strange and difficult times, one reason the American dream stays alive is that new people keep showing up who believe in it. And, because they believe that America is the land of freedom and op...
In Legacies, Portes and Rumbaut report that most immigrants move into the middle-class mainstream in one or two generations. That is the good news. The bad news is that if they don't make it quickly i...