These evil freaks, Karrin said. They always pick the most charming places to hang out.
Whatever, I said. It’s getting cloying in here. Are we there yet? He smiled. Jerk. Wuss. Jackass. Pansy. Philistine. Dandysprat. Butthead. Whiner …
Maybe my values are outdated, but I come from an old school of thought. I think that men ought to treat women like something other than just shorter, weaker men with breasts. Try and convict me if I’m...
Likest thou jelly within thy doughnut?Nay, but prithee, with sprinkles 'pon it instead, I said solemnly, and frosting of white.
Well, I never been to much school, you understand, but it seems to me that you're assuming something you shouldn't assume... that God sees the world like you do; one thing at a time, from just one spo...
I shied away from that line of thought, lest it bring up too many old memories.
Like I said, magic comes from life, and especially from emotions. They're a source of the same intangible energy that everyone can feel when an autumn moon rises and fills you with a sudden sense of b...
Playing cat and mouse is generally only fun for the cat.
My cat walked on my face just after dawn.
I didn't want to believe that killing was deep inside of me. I didn't want to think about the part of me that took a dark joy in gathering all the power it could and using it as I saw fit, everything...
So you really could die. Your godmother is right, you know. You are mad as a hatter. Nutty as a fruitcake. Crazy like a fox, I said.
It took a freaking to put this together, Michael.I hefted my staff.Fortunately, I said, and took a two-handed swing at the nearest stand of slender, delicate crystal. It shattered with gratifying eas...
You humans have the potential to be the most wonderful beings there are—if you can get past all these enormous stupid spots you seem to have in your hearts. It’s not your fault. You just don’t know ho...
With your head, the wall breaks first.
I slip into the archaic at dramatically appropriate moments. So sue me.
Parkour, I panted. Bitch.
I knew I didn't have much of a chance of getting away from that swarm of fae piranha, but it was an infinitely larger chance than I would have if I stayed in the car and burned to death. Hell's bells,...
Of good confronting evil, of light overcoming darkness, of love transcending hate. He tilted his head. Isn’t that where all faith begins?
One day, I told myself, one brave and magnificent day, I will actually be cool. I
This is Waldo Butters, and his geek penis is longer and harder than any of ours put together.
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