[Ford said] .. On its world, the people are people. The leaders are lizards. The people hate the lizards and the lizards rule the people.Odd, said Arthur. I thought you said it was a democracy.I did,...
Wow,' said Zaphod Beeblebrox to the Heart of Gold. There wasn't much else he could say.He said it again because he knew it would annoy the press. 'Wow.'The crowd turned their faces back toward him exp...
What was the Sherlock Holmes principle? ‘Once you have discounted the impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.’ I reject that entirely, said Dirk sharply. The imposs...
The fact that all of this was happening in virtual space made no difference. Being virtually killed by virtual laser in virtual space is just as effective as the real thing, because you are as dead as...
The Somebody Else's Problem field is much simpler and more effective, and what's more can be run for over a hundred years on a single torch battery. This is because it relies on people's natural dispo...
The Saab seethed off into the night. Arthur watched it go, as stunned as a man might be who, having believed himself to be totally blind for five years, suddenly discovers that he had merely been wear...
The President of the Universe holds no real power. His sole purpose is to take attention away from where the power truly exists...
Some fish were jumping up the beach and into the tree, which struck me as an odd thing for a fish to do, but I tried not to be judgmental about it. I was feeling pretty raw about my own species, and n...
She shook her head in puzzlement.'You're very strange,' she said.'No, I'm very ordinary,' said Arthur,'but some very strange things have happened to me. You could say I'm more differed from than diffe...
Rob McKenna was a miserable bastard and he knew it because he'd had a lot of people point it out to him over the years and he saw no reason to disagree with them except the obvious one which was that...
Proving nothing, said Ford. I wouldn't trust that computer to speak my weight.I can do that for you, sure, enthused the computer, punching out more ticker tape. I can even work out your personality pr...
Perhaps I'm old and tired, but I always think that the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say hang the sense of it and just keep your...
My universe is my eyes and my ears. Anything else is hearsay.
My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.
Mostly harmless
It is of course perfectly natural to assume that everyone else is having a far more exciting time than you. Human beings, for instance, have a phrase that describes this phenomenon, ‘The other man’s g...
In fact there was only one species on the planet more intelligent than dolphins, and they spent a lot of their time in behavioural research laboratories running around inside wheels and conduction fri...
If, [the management consultant] said tersely, we could for a moment move on to the subject of fiscal policy. . .Fiscal policy! whooped Ford Prefect. Fiscal policy!The management consultant gave him a...
If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.
I'm so great even I get tongue-tied talking to myself.