Fate often puts all the material for happiness and prosperity into a man's hands just to see how miserable he can make himself with them.
A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.
This is another day! Are its eyes blurred With maudlin grief for any wasted past? A thousand thousand failures shall not daunt! Let dust clasp dust death death I am alive!
An optimist is a man who has never had much experience.
If a child shows himself to be incorrigible, he should be decently and quietly beheaded at the age of twelve, lest he grow to maturity, marry, and perpetuate his kind.
The goal of all civilization all religious thought and all that sort of thing is simply to have a good time. But man gets so solemn over the process that he forgets the end.
I have often noticed that ancestors never boast of the descendants who boast of ancestors. I would rather start a family than finish one. Blood will tell, but often it tells too much.
If you want to get rich from writing, write the sort of thing that's read by persons who move their lips when they're reading to themselves.
One of the most important things to remember about infant care is: don't change diapers in midstream.
The successful people are the ones who think up things for the rest of the world to keep busy at.
There is nothing we like to see so much as the gleam of pleasure in a person's eye when he feels that we have sympathized with him understood him interested ourself in his welfare. At these moments...
There is nothing so habit-forming as money.
they thought they were heroes when they were only cinders in the eye of humanity too many creatures both insects and humans estimate their own value by the amount of irritation they are able to cause...
We pay for the mistakes of our ancestors, and it seems only fair that they should leave us the money to pay with.
Pity the meek for they shall inherit the earth.
Happiness comes fleetingly now and then To those who have learned to do without it And to them only.
my master is the same as godwhen he thumps with his handpeople bring us hamburg steaksat any eating stand "pete s holiday
fire is beautifuland we know that if we gettoo close it will kill usbut what does that matterit is better to be happy for a momentand be burned up with beautythan to live a long timeand be bored all t...