Albert Ellis Quote
Another major difference between anger and other emotions results in what we call the angry person’s paradox. When we experience depression, guilt, shame, or anxiety, we usually upset ourselves about something that we think we did or some characteristic we have that we think is the cause of our disturbed emotion. As a result we try to change ourselves. However, anger usually involves the externalizing of blame. When we become angry, we usually consider the source of our anger to be outside ourselves. We would not be angry if other people did not do the stupid things they do. If we think the causes of anger are outside ourselves, the solution to our anger problems appears to us to be changes other people have to make. If the external cause of our anger is not going to change, we remain trapped in our rage.
Another major difference between anger and other emotions results in what we call the angry person’s paradox. When we experience depression, guilt, shame, or anxiety, we usually upset ourselves about something that we think we did or some characteristic we have that we think is the cause of our disturbed emotion. As a result we try to change ourselves. However, anger usually involves the externalizing of blame. When we become angry, we usually consider the source of our anger to be outside ourselves. We would not be angry if other people did not do the stupid things they do. If we think the causes of anger are outside ourselves, the solution to our anger problems appears to us to be changes other people have to make. If the external cause of our anger is not going to change, we remain trapped in our rage.
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About Albert Ellis
Based on a 1982 professional survey of American and Canadian psychologists, he was considered the second most influential psychotherapist in history (Carl Rogers ranked first in the survey; Sigmund Freud was ranked third). Psychology Today noted that, "No individual—not even Freud himself—has had a greater impact on modern psychotherapy."