“ Is this what Principal Fontana meant by the phrase 'well-rounded'?It’s fucking spherical, Catamounts. Sam Lipsyte
“ You think everyone will stay behind and do everything you did all over again, forever. You picture old geezers in jean jackets doing whip-its behind the plaza. Sam Lipsyte
“ The Rough Beast snorted. “You don’t get it at all, buddy. It’s not about wrestling. It’s about stories. We’re storytellers.”Caperton studied him. “Somebody at my job just said that.”“It’s true! You ha… Sam Lipsyte
“ It's hard to fuck your girlfriend when she's fucked up and you're not. It's harder than the skee-ball they used to have at the Plaza arcade, all that agony over a fuzzy piece. Sam Lipsyte
“ Why do you think posers pose? Because they want to be invited to the dominion of the real. And they know their very desire for it disqualifies them. Sam Lipsyte
“ They sought each other, missed each other, at cocktail parties, in train terminals, at flower shops, their fin de siecle Nokias gaining symbolic power with each scene. Sam Lipsyte
“ You said you were having a dream.” “It’s true, I did.” “Was it the one where you’re inside the girl and you are pumping her and pumping her and you are so happy but then it turns out it’s not a girl,… Sam Lipsyte
“ She liked reality shows the best, and then the shows that purported to be about reality. Sam Lipsyte
“ So, yes, I should have just surrendered, cinched the entitled scion her little pouch of entitlements, put in my calls to the name shufflers, done my duty. I thought about that moment later on. Maybe I… Sam Lipsyte
“ Fuck,” said Bernie. “Fuckwinky eyeballhead.” “No, Bernie. We don’t use those words.” “Which words?” “You know which words.” “You used them, Daddy.” “I made a mistake. I am sorry I said that word. It i… Sam Lipsyte
“ Yes,” said Cooley. “That is the question, as the Bard might say.” “The Bard?” “What’s so funny?” said Cooley. “Nothing, sir,” I said. “I just didn’t know people still used that term.” “Well, I’m a peo… Sam Lipsyte
“ Oh, do you, Milo? You’re so selfish. You don’t see the bigger picture.” “What’s the bigger picture?” “You’re still here looking for handouts. Who’s going to take care of me?” “I’m on my knees here, Mo… Sam Lipsyte
“ We’d been walking in endless rectangles and now we were near the candy store again. The lights were out, the security gate down. We leaned up against the wall of a bank and I could feel the cool stone… Sam Lipsyte
“ I felt as though I were snorting cocaine, or rappelling down a cliffside, or cliffsurfing off a cliff of pure cocaine. Sam Lipsyte
“ You pay a whore to make you feel like a man, you fund a philharmonic to make yourself feel like a refined man. Sam Lipsyte
“ They weren’t like dolls, because dolls had no feelings. Kids had feelings, just not any remotely related to yours. Sam Lipsyte
“ I was also one of those people who hadn’t caught up with the latest social networking site. Maura belonged to most of them. She passed most evenings befriending men who had tried to date-rape her in h… Sam Lipsyte
“ We are going to eat ice cream and we are going to eat shit. The trick is to use different spoons. Sam Lipsyte
