“ Don't bemoan your misspent life quite yet. Forgive me for flaunting my experience, but you have no conception of what a misspent life constitutes. David Mitchell
“ Deeper’n that it’s this. The savage sat’fies his needs now. He’s hungry, he’ll eat. He’s angry, he’ll knuckly. He’s swellin’, he’ll shoot up a woman. His master is his will, an’ if his will say-soes K… David Mitchell
“ Bitch is a stingless insult these days - it hurts like, I don't know, a celery-stabbing. David Mitchell
“ Astronomers at the University of Bullshitshire have just found new evidence that, yes, teenagers really are the center of the universe.’ David Mitchell
“ And grade every simile and metaphor from one star to five, and remove any threes or below. It hurts when you operate, but afterwards you feel much better. David Mitchell
“ All minds pulse in a unique way, just as every lighthouse in the world has a unique signature. Some minds pulse consistently, some erratically. Some are lukewarm, some are hot. Some flare out, some ar… David Mitchell
“ A true suicide is a paced, disciplined certainty. People pontificate, 'Suicide is Selfishness.' Career churchmen go a step further and call it a cowardly assault on the living...Cowardice has nothing… David Mitchell
“ An' that cold hand o' wind was Old Georgie's hand, yay, the devil what was standin' there wavin' a crookit spoon. David Mitchell
“ You look for your meaning. You find it, and at that moment, your meaning changes, and you have to start all over again. David Mitchell
“ Writing novels worth reading will bugger up your mind, jeopardize your relationships, and distend your life. David Mitchell
“ Why’s it okay to draw spaceships if you’re seven, but not okay to draw diabolical mazes? Who decides that spending money on Space Invaders is fine, but if you buy a calculator with loads of symbols yo… David Mitchell
“ Why fight the 'natural' (oh, weaselly word!) order of things? Why? Because of this--one fine day, a purely predatory world shall consume itself. In an individual, selfishness uglifies the soul; for th… David Mitchell
“ While the wealthy are no more likely to be born stupid than the poor, a wealthy upbringing compounds stupidity while a hardscrabble childhood dilutes it, if only for Darwinian reasons. This is why the… David Mitchell
