Craig Schaefer Quotes

There are few things more dangerous than a zealot with discipline,

Imagine if somebody gave you a trophy for ‘making such a great effort to be a real human being.’ You’d be pissed. That’s one way of putting it.

If you even think about pulling another heist, I’ll be there. If you rob a bank, I’ll be in the vault waiting for you. If you so much as shoplift a candy bar, I’ll be standing right behind you in the...

Good. I need to arm up. All I’ve got is a gun with four bullets, and it’s a really embarrassing gun.

It was professional courtesy backed up by the promise of mutually assured destruction. He could take out any one of us, if he put his back into it, but he knew that would bring every magician in the c...

You take a job, you do the job. Even when the job is to stand beside his throne at a gala and look vaguely menacing. You’re good at that, I said. Yes, but the specific and targeted sort of menacing is...

If all goes well, I’ll see you at the banquet. If I don’t show, scrub the job and get out any way you can. Why wouldn’t you show? Ben asked, nervous again. Because, I told him, that means I’m dead.

She arched one eyebrow, incredulous, and tilted her head. Daniel? Did you forget who I work for? In retrospect, it was a dumb question on my part.

And, uh, could I borrow somebody’s car? Mine’s impounded and I can’t reclaim it because I’m kinda legally dead right now.

We heard the clinking of glasses and faint, conversational laughter. A human torso, crudely butchered, lay across a glass table with its innards still wet and glistening. Lauren sat beside it, dressed...

My goal, on the other hand, was to convince you to meet me somewhere remote. Somewhere I could finish you off without fear of interruption. So I prepared a— I know, I said. The book’s a fake, and you...

Was that…was that some kind of demon? he said. I looked over at the bottle and shook my head. No. No, that was just a major-league asshole.

Look at this writing. Can you read? What does it say? Happy…graduation, sir? It was for a funeral! Happy graduation? What’s he graduated to? Worm food?

Pulling a heist is like going on vacation: you’re never ready when you think you are, there’s always one last thing to pack, and there’s always something you forgot. If you’re lucky, you remember it a...

C’mon, clock’s ticking. Let’s go pick a fight with an evil billionaire wizard.

Of course, the best lies are always wrapped in verifiable truth. It makes the filling easier to swallow.

Oh, hey, I said. Looks like the whole Vegas Metro SWAT division is here. Plus the FBI, Homeland Security, and probably the IRS for good measure.

Everyone, Caitlin said, cradling her wine glass, is the hero of his own story. That goes double for fanatics. Some of the greatest horrors in history were perpetrated by people who insisted, all the w...

You either need to get some kind of guarantee of silence out of Nicky Agnelli—the kind that’ll sew his lips shut for life—or start checking into countries that don’t have extradition treaties.

How about you, Dan? What do you do for a living? Well, Ben, until recently I was a hired wand for the biggest gang boss in Las Vegas, but we had a falling-out, so mostly I just run short cons and some...